Our wall of weird, wacky and downright ludicrous
SOMETHING about the ludicrous sets my neural pathways a-firin'.
Maybe it was all those brain fevers as a runt. Or the head-knock that followed a misguided second-storey, gravity-assisted judo chop to my mate Tom the Greek's neck in high school.
Either way, when truth is stranger than fiction my heart's cockles get excruciatingly warm.
So strap on those tinfoil hats and bask in the warped glory of The Chronicle's Wall of Weird.
Double the gherkin
TOOWOOMBA mum Kylie Steger was appalled to find an extra pickle on her Hungry Jack's burger in April, 2012.
The picture really told the story: Ms Steger lifted her dinner to find a crudely-drawn tallywhacker lurking beneath the burger.
To make matters worse, the burger was a Whopper. The appendage was not.
Hungry Jack's launched an internal investigation after stating they took the matter "very seriously".
Cake bandits strike
POLICE were called when two juvenile delinquents broke into a school, smashed everything in sight... and tried to bake a cake.
Intruder alarms were triggered in February when two children, aged nine and 11, shattered a glass door and proceeded to bust holes in the school's pool cover while taking a dip.
They migrated to the home economics block, trashed the joint and made half-hearted attempts to blend up a pre-made cake mix.
The walls were spattered with chocolate when police arrived.
Amazing half cat
THIS one was a tragic story with a happy ending - the tale of Super Ted the two-legged kitty.
The poor creature lost two limbs after, vets believed, getting caught in a car's fan belt.
Miraculously, Ted survived and learned to walk (somewhat unsteadily) all the way into his adoptive family's hearts.
Super Ted is now a minor internet celebrity and even has his own Facebook page with more than 2000 fans.
TOOWOOMBA musician Peter Achilles is no stranger to bizarre instruments but his latest creation was by far the most peculiar.
In a world where everything has seemingly been done before, Mr Achilles broke the mould.
He converted a vintage Hoover vacuum cleaner into a functional set of bagpipes in 2009.
"I held on to the idea for about 10 years and thought it was time to give it a go," he told The Chronicle.
"It's the only one in the world."
We don't doubt that for a minute.
Mr Achilles also played the saw (using a horse-hair violin bow) and was a virtuosic gum-leafist.
Man's best wife
PUPPY love went too far when Joseph Guiso held a public ceremony in Laurel Bank Park to marry his best friend, Honey the labrador.
The couple decided to get hitched after seeing a wedding in the park during an afternoon walk.
"I said that could be us. She didn't say anything so I took that as a 'yes'," Mr Guiso said.
This story made worldwide news and sporadically pops up in The Chronicle's "best-read" list online.
Brewing up tourism
MATT "Skeg" Anderson and Chris "Afghan" D'Alton combined their love of booze and travelling by skolling "beer bongs" in front of monuments all over the country.
Their photo album is truly a sight to see - they have chugged down funnels full of beer in front of everything from the Sydney Opera House to the Big Mango.
"The cold, crisp taste of beer relaxes us and keeps us happy (we are not alcoholics)," Mr Anderson assured us.
Bizarre phone hoax
YOUNG couple Kurt Spicer and Kiara McAvan were targeted by a genuinely weird phone-pest last year.
It started with a fake pizza order and weird calls but eventually became ridiculous.
Before long a plastering business turned up to give a quote, unwanted taxis arrived and a party hire company tried to deliver a jumping castle, 1000 balloons, a jukebox and a clown.
The situation soured when a Toowoomba pound worker came to put-down the couple's dog, after false reports it had parvovirus.
And those were just the tip of the iceberg...
HAVE you noticed the stunning height of the Kitchener St palm tree?
Plenty of others have - a Facebook profile even exists for "stalwart supporter of this spectacular softwood spire".
As The Chronicle reported, fans even believed it produced coconuts whose milk had "superior thirst-quenching ability to Solo".
CHRISTIE McCabe somehow managed to turn an interview with an earthworm into a free trip to the Olympics.
She filmed the unorthodox discussion with one of the zippy invertebrates from Crows Nest's Perseverance Cup worm race.
Once completed, she entered it into an international competition to find the world's best bloggers to report on the London Olympics.
And she won!
IN ONE of the strangest insurance claims to come from the Darling Downs in recent years, Junction View woman Abbie Veivers had to explain how two cows trashed her children's games room causing more than $10,000 worth of damage.
The two cows - a 500kg Ayrshire named Rosie and a 300kg Friesian named Pinky Willow - nudged open a door, which slammed shut behind them.
They were trapped overnight and were only discovered when Mrs Veivers noticed Pinky's massive tongue licking the window.
- Strange tales
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