Kristen Henry received a mortifying note from her neighbours. 'Please Be Careful': Warning Note Left for Driver Prompts Search for Red-Bellied Snake. Credit - Michael Garbutt via Storyful
Kristen Henry received a mortifying note from her neighbours. 'Please Be Careful': Warning Note Left for Driver Prompts Search for Red-Bellied Snake. Credit - Michael Garbutt via Storyful

Neighbours leave mortifying note

GET tinted windows, they said. No-one will be able to see in, they said.

They LIED, according to my nosy neighbours.

They've left me a note in my letterbox which I'm hoping is a note sent to all residents in my apartment building and NOT one solely for me. Main word being "hoping" because, if I'm being honest, my gut says I've been caught.

Nobody wants to receive this from their neighbours.
Nobody wants to receive this from their neighbours.

I mean c'mon. It's handwritten. Do we REALLY need to call Jessica Fletcher?

"A friendly reminder" it starts off sweetly, that "we are in a close-knit community. Most of us have blinds but one has tinted windows and at night with the lights on you can see in".

Oh lordy, I have tinted windows. I purchased 'frosted opaque' because it let you "enjoy the outside without letting prying eyes seeing in?!" I swear that's what the brochure said.

My mind began to race. What have they seen? How long has the peep show been in town? Why are they only telling me NOW? I've lived there for two years!

Most importantly, my apartment faces hundreds of others, if one neighbour has had front row seats to my life, HOW MANY OTHERS HAVE BEEN WATCHING TOO?

There are so many apartments that could have a ‘full view’.
There are so many apartments that could have a ‘full view’.

The note isn't nasty, thank goodness. More of a warning that Married At First Sight is being out-rated in my "close-knit community" by the real-life reality show going on in my apartment.

"Each to their own," the note continues, "that's your choice. But wanted to bring it to your attention. Kind regards, your Neighbours."

Now, to give you context, if an apartment has four walls, the entire left side of my home is glass. EVERY SINGLE ROOM has one glass wall. My main concern being the lounge/kitchen area which faces a wall of apartments, with potentially hundreds of eyes peering in.

Who said getting to know your neighbours was a ye olde tradition? It's called bonding! That's BONDING not BONDAGE for the record, Peery McPeery Face.

Happy to chat over coffee guys ... but please tell me if I’m revealing too much!
Happy to chat over coffee guys ... but please tell me if I’m revealing too much!

It's not as if my fiance and I are spending 'quality adult time' smack bang in the middle of the lounge room. However, I'd be lying if I said on the trip from the bathroom to the bedroom, swinging by for a water in the birthday suit doesn't happen. Most nights.

I guess I just feel exposed. Literally. They warned me that we'd be under each other's noses in this style of living, I didn't realise they'd be able to see my nose. And every other part of me.

Oh gawd, am I being talked about in Strata meetings? Am I "that" neighbour people have been talking about, everyone discussing who would be the one to "break the nude news".

I see you all every day in the lift or at our monthly drinks. Why didn't someone quietly point it out?

Well, I guess they have now and I should be grateful for that.

How does the song go? Neighbours. Everybody needs good neighbours.*

*As long as they're not watching you sleep.

Kristen Henry is one half of the Kristen and Wilko show on MIX 106.3 Canberra. Follow her adventures at channelk.com.au.



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